This simple post is amazing. I don't connect well with people because I always feel inferior to them, judged by them and am afraid they will see the real me. I rarely laugh with anyone except my kids. For some reason, I can just be myself with them. Why can't I just be myself with everyone? I'm afraid that if I relax and let me guard down that I will fail in some way.
Forester, thanks for your note. I know how you feel. Partly because I felt way outside the male fraternity, I've stuttered most of my life. I allowed this handicap to generate great feelings of inferiority and fear of rejection. However, I rarely stutter now, usually when I'm anxious or fear failure. So how did I get around the problem? I learned to lighten up, laugh at myself and with others, and to love more wholeheartedly.
The church admittedly sets up great expectations of the ideal man, the ideal father, the ideal priesthood holder. While this gives us target traits to strive for, it also can be a source of inferiority and guilt when we don't measure up. And we all feel this, especially in our primal Moho sensibilities. However, we fail others when we fail to love ourselves. In other words, people will be disappointed in 'the real you' if you are first disappointed with yourself.
So how about if we all give ourselves permission to be less than perfect, a work in progress, a real human? Go ahead, laugh with another man and realize that you're really not that far apart, and know how good that feels.
DB, I didn't know that Victor Borge was Danish! I thnk he was so gifted because he recognized the humor in our human foibles with great love and respect. Here is another quote of his:
"Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations."
thanks for commenting on my blog - I absolutely love the pictures you post - they are awesome and do make me smile!
I also enjoyed your response to forester - I too create a horrible anxiety around others which is really debilitating my existence and it just so annoying- so yeah like you say I need to lighten up and just laugh and accept myself! I need to just do it already
Welcome to Geckoman's blog, an exploration of living with love and faith. Why the Gecko? Search my blog for "poem" and select Gecko. I want to see the world through eyes which are accustomed to ups and downs. My reality is that I go back and forth between my chosen LDS world and an inner vision striving for focus with a gay lens. I am a creative who is rarely satisfied with things as they are. Please feel free to comment.
5 comments:
This simple post is amazing. I don't connect well with people because I always feel inferior to them, judged by them and am afraid they will see the real me. I rarely laugh with anyone except my kids. For some reason, I can just be myself with them. Why can't I just be myself with everyone? I'm afraid that if I relax and let me guard down that I will fail in some way.
Forester, thanks for your note. I know how you feel. Partly because I felt way outside the male fraternity, I've stuttered most of my life. I allowed this handicap to generate great feelings of inferiority and fear of rejection. However, I rarely stutter now, usually when I'm anxious or fear failure. So how did I get around the problem? I learned to lighten up, laugh at myself and with others, and to love more wholeheartedly.
The church admittedly sets up great expectations of the ideal man, the ideal father, the ideal priesthood holder. While this gives us target traits to strive for, it also can be a source of inferiority and guilt when we don't measure up. And we all feel this, especially in our primal Moho sensibilities. However, we fail others when we fail to love ourselves. In other words, people will be disappointed in 'the real you' if you are first disappointed with yourself.
So how about if we all give ourselves permission to be less than perfect, a work in progress, a real human? Go ahead, laugh with another man and realize that you're really not that far apart, and know how good that feels.
Can I just say I love Victor Borge. And it's not because he is Danish. He was my favorite comedian. Thanks for what you posted. It really is true!
DB,
I didn't know that Victor Borge was Danish! I thnk he was so gifted because he recognized the humor in our human foibles with great love and respect. Here is another quote of his:
"Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations."
-- Victor Borge
thanks for commenting on my blog - I absolutely love the pictures you post - they are awesome and do make me smile!
I also enjoyed your response to forester - I too create a horrible anxiety around others which is really debilitating my existence and it just so annoying- so yeah like you say I need to lighten up and just laugh and accept myself! I need to just do it already
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